If you were raised by Maltese parents in the 90s you probably have PTSD from hearing the story so many times.
It was the ultimate act of authoritarianism by former Prime Minister Dom Mintoff. “Let them eat cake? Fuck that, they don’t even deserve chocolate.”
And just like that, Maltese people were doomed to a life without chocolate.
Well ok, so it might have actually gone a little differently. But the reality was that there was practically only one type of chocolate Maltese people could buy: Desserta. And the consensus passed down from generations is that it tasted terrible.
In order to protect Maltese industry, Mintoff’s government disallowed importation of things that were produced in Malta, so when a Desserta began to be manufactured on the island, it was practically the only chocolate that could be bought, from the late 1970s up until 1987. Other chocolates had to be smuggled in and became a rare pleasure and act of defiance.
So when the food page Ch-Eat uploaded a photo of an old Desserta advert, it obviously triggered people.
“Desserta was disgusting chocolate if you can even call it chocolate! It wouldn’t even melt when you tried cooking it,” said one Facebook users.
“Holy shit, If we did not have all the flavours, we would get fined,” recalled another.
And in case the photo doesn’t trigger you, just read the last line of the ad which can be translated to: “Especially for housewives there’s cooking chocolate in both plain and milk.”
Oh, the 80s.