11 Things Your Nanna Says Which Screw You Up In Unfathomable Ways

Our nanniet are the most endearing people in the universe. We love them like crazy and they’re simply the bee’s knees. However, we cannot deny that sometimes they say the craziest things.

This stuff which has plagued you since forever and will most probably keep on haunting you ’til the day you die.

Here are 11 things nanniet say which screwed our heads up.

1. The not-so-subtle body shaming

“Mhux qed tmut bil-ġuħ, hux?!”

We all know that nanniet are not the best at controlling their thought-to-mouth filter. Especially when it came to physical discrepancies.

Some of our nanniet were a tad bit horrible when it came to pointing out weight gain, overgrown eyebrows, physical shortcomings and mental capacities.

But don’t worry; they honestly meant well.

2. Threatening to write you out of their will

“Xejn ma nħallilek ta!”

We all got this one at some point in our lives.

Whether it was over general misbehaviour or dying your hair a crazy colour, your nanna always pulled this trump card to get you back in line.

It worked for some time, until we realised what a hassle it was to keep on changing your will every time one of the cousins misbehaves.

3. “Guide” you into their dream path

Nanniet want what’s best for us, but that doesn’t always mean that it really is what’s best.

They tried to guide us into their own career paths or subtly bully us into living their dreams by trying to sabotage our train of thought.

“U le, mhux aħjar tidħol tabib?”

4. Making it super obvious which kuġin is the favourite

Some nanniet tried to do this subtly, but it was not always a success. Not at all.

It was often really obvious which kuġin got the best cuts of the loot: from toys to cash prizes. This cousin was the favourite and it showed.

No matter how hard the nanniet tried to conceal it, it was still the most obvious thing in the universe.

“Ara Mark ħa, kemm dejjem bravu ħanini!”

5. Terrifying you with old superstitions

Your nanniet always have an old wives’ tale at hand to shove down your throat. Be it you’ll get a stroke if you wash your hair when on your period, or not getting married if you eat straight out of pots and pans, they also know what to say to make you actually wet your bed.

Some even went as far as to terrify us with ghosts and weird-ass monsters. Thanks for the long lasting childhood scars, nann.

6. Food shaming

“Tkomplix tiekol għax se tiħxien” or “Kul qisek aringa” were resonant sentences we’re all too familiar with. Whether it was shaming you into stuffing your face or shaming you to stop stuffing your face, nanna never failed to instil those food-related anxieties within you.

There was also the old classic “Sajjartlek ħa, kul għax taqsamli qalbi.”

7. Imposing their beliefs on you

Religion, politics, you name it – your nanniet always had a way of shoving their agendas down your throat. Of course we always forgave them for this. After giving them ample amounts of discreet eye-rolling sessions, of course.

8. Guilt tripping you

“Qatt ma ċċempilli”/“Qatt ma tiġi tarani” emotional blackmail is one of your nanniet’s most powerful ace cards.

They feel like no matter how much you call or visit, it’s never enough. Being the patriarchs and matriarchs of the family makes them feel entitled to constant calls and visits. Which, to be fair, they are.

9. Listing their endless ailments

This was not scary per se, but it did make you fear your own mortality like no other. Your nanniet really have a way of making you realise that health, youth, beauty and life are not a forever thing.

It also instilled an early fear of loss, especially that of your beloved nanniet.

10. Telling you who to vote for

As soon as elections are remotely close, your nanniet would use all the tricks up their sleeve to convince you to vote for their stellar party.

There’s five infamous stages of this process, which involve guilt tripping, instilling fears within you, pestering you, threatening you and finally crying.

11. Stories of the beatings they took at school

Whenever the subject falls on education there is one thing your nanniet remember really well, and that’s the canings and beatings they used to get from their teachers.

Most still remember that horrifying wooden ruler used to beat the shit out of their thighs, and most of us still remember the terrible stories they used to tell us.

Is there anything we forgot to mention? Leave us a comment below

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