7 Insanely Annoying Things About Planning A Wedding In Malta

Till death do us part… unless this pre-wedding stress gets us first. A day as expensive and important as your wedding comes with so much stress, why do people insist on adding even more?

1. Maltese opinions are strong, and you will hear all of them

We’re an opinionated nation, granted – but when you’re getting married the last thing you want to hear is Aunty Jessie’s take on what flowers would look good and Uncle Joe’s rant about how cold the whiskey needs to be before serving.

Learning to stick with your guns can be a life-saver

2. Bureaucracy on the island will stress you out

From ring sizes to font changes, everything needs to go through 17 layers for approval and each one will pile on a little more stress you definitely didn’t need.

3. Maltese shop owners will call you ‘sinjorina’ every chance they get

This will be done in an attempt to make you feel like you shouldn’t have strong opinions on your own wedding choices. They’ll also use phrases like ‘ikkalma ftit pupa’ or ‘many people have gotten married before you’ to make sure you really know your place.

4. Writing a guest list in Malta means inviting 20 people, or 600

And no matter how big that number gets, someone is going to get offended. Friends of friends and their cousins are a must, and while it’s always good to ask your friends and family if you’ve left anyone out, you also need to get used to putting your foot down.

5. And writing the invites is even worse than planning the guest list

All the different formal combinations of Dr, Ms, Prof , Mr, Mrs…will blow your mind. And in Malta mis-titling someone is no joke. You’re going to spend hours fretting over the correct spelling of peoples’ names and they’re only going to spend one minute reading the invite. Unless you make a mistake, then it will haunt you.

6. You’ve never stressed about weather this much

It’s meant to be sunny Malta – why is there a cloud in the sky? The wedding is a month away what if that cloud multiplies.

The stress can be a slippery slope that quickly becomes a scary obsession. Also, everyone who has your number suddenly becomes a weather expert, texting you updates every chance they get.

7. It’s over in a flash

You’ve poured your blood, sweat, tears and then some more tears into this day and it goes by in a flash. That’s probably the most annoying thing about the whole experience – so make sure to take the time to truly appreciate your big day.

While a lot of the comments can get annoying and repetitive, most of them come from a place of love. People may get on your nerves, but they’re just trying to do their bit to help out, and get involved.

Shout out to Tikka Miggiani for the awesome suggestions – and congrats on your big day.

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