Sometimes, your brain will decide it’s time for you to suffer as it blares out one single song, on loop, until you’re just about ready to lose your mind. While certain pop melodies are designed specifically to become earworms, the number one perpetrator of invasive-lyric-syndrome is the Eurovision Song Contest.
They say forewarned if forearmed, so here are the six you really need to look out for this week (apart from our very own Chameleon, of course!)
1. Replay – Cyprus
Some shady comments may have been made about it being ‘budget Malta’ in the competition – but no matter where you stand in the battle of the dance numbers, you’re wrong if you think your brain isn’t going to replay (sorry) the phrase ‘re-plehh, re-plehhh, re-pleeeeh’ over and over.
2. Zero Gravity – Australia
Yes, Kate Miller-Heidke traveled thousands of miles to continental Europe(ish) just to enter the competition with a weaker version of Sweden’s 2009 La Voix – but that doesn’t mean you won’t be powering through (read: singing off-key to) the staccato of the chorus in the shower.
3. Roi – France
Repeated vowel sounds will be the death of us – and the ‘oh oh oh’s of France’s king, Bilal Hassani, are an easy contender for endless repeatng. Plus, your brain will take any chance it can to think it can sing in French.
4. Look Away – Finland
In the wise words of Alyssa Edwards, this song is garbage mama. But he says ‘look away’ so many times, it’s guaranteed to stick with your regardless of how much you look away (again, sorry) out of sheer boredom.
5. Soldi – Italy
Will you be singing this every time you’re alone in the shower or stuck in traffic? 100% guaranteed.
Will you get more than half of the lyrics right? Absolutely not.
Italy’s Mahomood knew what he was doing with this song. It has a fun audience participation moment with the claps, and lots of peaks and valleys in the actual vocals, so while most of us will struggle to get the notes right, we’re going to be trying for a long time.
6. Say Na Na Na – San Marino
Honestly, this song shouldn’t have made it to the Eurovision stage. But it’s there now, and in your darkest moments when insomnia hits hard, you’ll close your eyes and a voice will whisper: say na na na.
And it will do it in that cringey accent too.
BONUS: Telemoveis – Portugal
You may not know where to start when it comes to singing this one, but you’re definitely going to try out some of these dance moves later. Maybe avoid the death drop till you’re on a soft surface though.