Get Completely Żibel With This Drinking Game For The Malta Eurovision Song Contest 2018

Settle in and bring the booze

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Whether you love, or love to hate, the Malta Eurovision Song Contest, it's hard to deny it gets way better when turned into a drinking game. 

Rather than coming up with spontaneous rules throughout the night, why not print this out and try to keep up. Just make sure you're not driving anywhere after. 

You have to drink...

1. Every time an ad pops up with that annoying 'BING!'

Can they get more intrusive? Whenever you hear the dreaded advert 'bing' scream 'bing' back at your monitor and take a swig of your drink. 

2. Every time the ad is weirdly suggestive

Sometimes the ads are accidental gems, like when an ad for noise-cancelling headphones appears under an awkwardly off-key performance. Take a nice gulp whenever this happens.

3. Every time the Maltese cross is used

From the singer's postcard to the projections behind them, take a sip of your drink whenever you see the overused symbol.

4. Every time there's a grammatical error in a song

And trust us, there will be. This one's not as common, so make sure you down a hefty amount to help you forget that this mistake got through so many checks.

5. Every time someone makes the sign of the cross

Down your drink. This is the will of the Lord.

6. Every time a weird lyric makes you double take

Way more prevalent than incorrect grammar, weird lyrics make sense technically but everyone knows they're actually pretty fucked up. Take a big swig every time you hear one.

Warning: down your drink at the start of Dai Laga and call it a day for that song. We don't need anyone going to hospital after just three minutes. 

7. Every time the crowd blares foghorns and chants a singer's name

Sometimes the audience wants you to know exactly who their fave is. If there's an overwhelming amount of support (thing Claudia Fanniello before she even got on stage), down your drink.

If there's some lacklustre foghorns and a clearly-screamed name, take a swig.

The Classics

These aren't specific to Malta's Eurovision Song Contest, but it's near-sacrilege to leave them out.

You have to drink...

8. Every time there's a key change

Down your drink. This is the law, plain and simple.

9. Every time the presenter makes a joke that falls flat

This is going to happen... a lot. So pace yourself and take a sip every time they try (and probably fail).

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READ NEXT: VOTE: Which Of Malta's Eurovision Song Contest Front-Runners Should Win?

Written By

Chucky Bartolo

If there's no Mariah Carey GIF or reference to Eurovision in this article, just assume they've been edited out against my will.

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