Malta’s Gozitan diamond Michela Pace has just performed alongside 17 other Eurovision hopefuls at tonight’s second semi-final. And to be honest I have so many thoughts that before we discuss Michela’s performance, let’s discuss every other performance.
I’m in my pyjamas with a glass of wine. Let’s get started.
A Billie Eilish wannabe who looks like Lauren Jaregui from fifth Harmony, but I cannot tell you what she sounds like because the sound balance was so off. Also, I sag there as a shot of an empty stadium???? I call fake news.
In the words of my friend Steve ‘ah, sexy’. But oh so boring. The 50’s vibe was cute though.
Live sand art and a ballad and an extra AF dress. This is Eurovision.
Yaaas visuals, yaaas biceps, yaaas dance moves. But also yaaas predictable.
Why are literally all the songs so boring? That’s all I have to say for now.
I’m bored again. But I appreciate the androgynous and slightly sinister take they’re gone with for the performance. Very AHS Apocalypse.
Very cute, but if I hear another whiny girl singing a slow song I’m quitting. Also I want that giant chair.
Ara, we’re not all vanilla. I don’t hate this one too much, at least there’s some rhythmical creativity to the song. And some very strong vocals. Good job, Sweden.
I really like her hair. But it stops there.
Thea Garret called, she wants her wings back.
You can read more about Michela’s performance here, but I’ll just say this: three cheers for strong vocals, an exciting beat, and a fun performance.
A whiny boy singing a slow song. Okay.
That moment when he was staring out of the rainy window is me when someone tells me there’s no tea left in the cupboard.
I wasn’t paying enough attention to this one to form an opinion.
A very Eurovision song; a club beat, a man and a woman, a back-up singer that doesn’t really belong there performing some sort of Norwegian Viking chant, and pyrotechnics. I love it with all my heart.
This is the supposed winner I guess. I feel like he owes Coldpay some cash for a copyright strike though.
Oh no, I’m bored again. And what did the photos being projected mean? Very powerful voice though.
Ara, the Mars Rover.
I need to give a shout out to Shavla, the performers who took the stage after the contestants.
They had the most heart and passion and musical understand by a long run.