How To Be A Maltese Pedestrian In Seven Easy Steps

There are some rules... but they only apply on certain days of the week

Pedestrian Cover

Life in Malta can be pretty confusing, especially if you're new to the island. Things move quickly, people talk loudly and it's all too much most of the time. One of the scariest things you need to do on the daily in Malta is stepping out in to the wild arena that is our roads.

As part of our duty to our readers, we've devised a set of simple rules and guidelines to follow as a pedestrian on the ruthless roads of Malta.

1. Be aware that there might not always be a zebra crossing

You might need to a blind leap of faith sometimes and make your way across a very busy road without the use of any traffic calming measures.

2. If there is a zebra crossing, don't use it

You want to keep drivers on their toes, so when there is a zebra crossing, don't use it.

Cross the road five metres away from the crossing to surprise everyone. It also makes your life easier because you can cross to exactly where you need to be.

3. Be aware that there might not always be a pavement

Ok, you've crossed the road, but you still have some ways to go.

Unless you picked the perfect point in the road to cross to get you exactly outside your door.

So you might need to walk along the road a bit, and there might not be a pavement for you to walk on.

4. If there is a pavement, don't use it

Shake things up and walk in the middle of the road. Maybe even walk backwards if you want to, while texting on your phone.

We are Maltese and we take no shit. (Wow, irrelevant throwback what?)

5. Be afraid...

Nobody knows what your next move is going to be, and nobody knows what your next move is going to be.

It's just a matter of staying on your toes and looking left and right 25 times before making any sort of move ever.

6. ... but have no fear

Nobody knows what your next move is going to be, and nobody knows what your next move is going to be.

It's just a matter of doing what the fuck you want at all times without any regrets.

7. Take control

The most important thing to keep in mind is that you have the power to control everything.

If you need to cross at the most inconvenient point of the road, it's OK. Just play the pat of warden and hold your hand out while you cross. The drivers won't mind, don't worry.

Tag a friend who likes to live life on the edge

READ NEXT: 9 Types Of Maltese Traffic We've All Been Stuck In

Written By

Steffie Weenink

Steffie is a fan of equality and the arts. She's also partial to a meme or two. And she drinks a lot of tea.

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