We keep trying to win at football and the Eurovision, but we just can’t beat the competition. That’s only because we’ve been misappropriating our talent; the public lavatory is where our talents lie.
Easyjet’s inflight magazine ‘Traveller’ has named Valletta’s Strait Street public toilet the best public toilet in Europe, saying that “It’s not just a toilet, it’s a theatrical experience.” We here in Malta provide for our people where it matters the most, and everyone’s got to relieve themselves every once in a while.
And Valletta’s public crapper is the place to do it.
This snazzy bog was redesigned in 2010 by architect and designer Chris Briffa with an installation conceived by artist Norbert Attard.
It was such a hit with the bottoms that the toilets were even turned into a design piece and became an exhibition space for people to wander and sit after they wizz.
The work is meant to symbolize the thriving nightlife of Strait Street’s past. The tonalities of the red apertures against the grey walls intrigues public and looks much the interior of the Moulin Rouge in Paris or the Red Light District in Paris. The difference being, of course, that ours has got less boobs and more poos.
You walk in to flashing neon lights with the line ‘I love Tracey Emin,’ music then plays as you do your thing, and you leave with an in-house attendants who’s wearing a dinner jacket and a bowtie to wave you off as you get on with your day. That’s some fancy shit.