د . إAEDSRر . س

7 Ways You Can’t Escape Your Ex In Malta

Article Featured Image

Break ups are hard. Your self-esteem plummets, your friends hate you because you can talk about nothing else, and your tolerance for anyone else in love is completely oblitherated. At least you can take emotional refuge in the knowledge that in Malta you can totally escape any memory of your past love, avoiding any triggers that might send you spiralling into an abyss of despair…


Nope. Inaccurate. Here are all the ways it’s impossble to escape your ex in Malta:

1. You have exactly the same friends

And they’re not going to pick a side. So one of you has either stay home for life, find new friends, or meet your ex.


2. You live ten minutes away from each other

Popping out for some milk has never been a more perilous errand. You either have total reconstructive surgury to your face, or you risk meeting your ex.

Slowly Hiding Gif F9Bta02 Jpg

3. You made memories everywhere on the island

Remember how much you used to love watching sunset at Riviera bay? Yup, that morsel of joy has been destroyed forever. Same goes for that bench in Valletta, cakes in Mdina, walking on the Sliema promenade, etc. The list doesn’t end. You either have to move to Gozo (but there was that time you shared a plate of spaghetti rizzi in Xlendi!), or face memories of your ex.

Tumblr Nt3H9G Hn8 C1S4W9Wdo1 1280

4. Facebook is fucking unforgiving

Try as you might to avoid your ex’s Facebook profile, your feed is flooding with pictures of her/him in group selfies having the best time anyone on this planet ever had. Your only option is to leave the house. Where you’ll run into your ex. 

Tumblr Mghllr Ydo51Qmedouo1 500

5. Work isn’t even safe

Somehow, at some point, you will end up doing business with your ex’s uncle. You either need to switch to freelance and work from home, or sit in meetings everyday with someone related to your ex. 

Giphy 6

6. Your family are a nightmare

Forget family gatherings – they are where discretion and subtlety go to die. Ten thousand questions about why you’re no longer with Sarah/Jason. “Arukaża – she/he’s from a good family ta”. Ditch the relatives and go hang with your friends. Where you’ll meet your ex.


7. Low-key activities might be the answer

It’s fine, you can just spend every Saturday night at the cinema until you’re feeling better. As you sit down and get ready to dig into your one true love – buttery, salty popcorn – your ex’s face is plastered all over the gigantic cinema screen. Of course, you’d forgotten that ad campaign he/she had modelled for. Why are we so keen on encouraging local talent ffs?! I guess I’ll just spend the next two hours here, in darkness, thinking of my ex. 

Vma Crying 9

There’s no way you can share this post because your ex will see it. Why don’t you share this one instead?

READ NEXT: 9 Things Maltese People Do After A Breakup

You may also love

View All

Thank you for subscribing!

Your email has been added to our list.

lovinmalta.com says

Do you agree to share your location with us?