Practical Maltese Life Lessons We Should Have Learnt In School

July 20, 2018 at 10:14 am

Please take your seats class. Today we will be taking a step back from reality, and imagining a place where schools would put in a lesson a week dedicated entirely to your future in Malta.

No we know what you’re saying; isn’t every lesson really a lesson dedicated to your future? To which our reply is this – You read the title of this article and know exactly what we mean. You’ve wasted your time, and ours. See us after the lesson.

We’re listing a couple of practical Maltese life lessons schools should be teaching their students for when they leave, and enter the actual real world.

1. How to write a CV, Cover letter and conduct yourself in an interview

Isn’t the reason we go to school in the first place to get a job?

Unfortunately, once we’re out of school, it’s pretty much all in our hands. Schools around Malta should realise how helpless we are when our CV is typed out on the free Europass format.

A lesson or two on what to add to in your CV, how to properly write a cover letter, and the general unspoken rules of interview conduct can go a long way into preparing students for life’s journey.

2. General home skills

We’re talking basics here.

The fact is, everyone should know how to change a light bulb and maintain a liveable environment.

We’re not asking school to explain to kids how to use a mop and make toast, well maybe we are…some of these generation Z kids, jeez. To be quite fair, a lot of school do in fact have the subject Home Economics, however most of the time it is a subject a student must pick to take up to O Levels.

We ain’t askin’ for much, just a lesson on how to make pasta and clean up after yourself.

3. Banks and cards

You know that weird machine in the wall at every bank? Well, daddy doesn’t just put his card in and money magically come out.

Helping kids understand the importance of banks, loans, how to save money, and how cards work can help them a lot with their future, and also the basic understanding of debit and credit can also save them from a mistake itching to happen.

Truth be told, we might be going into parental jurisdiction, but let’s face it; would it really hurt if kids heard about these things before? Even just having an idea of what the words mean can really help.

4. Filling out Inland revenue forms

Oh sweet lord and savoy sour dip.

Every time one of those green devils comes in the post, it’s hell on earth.

Every year, year after year we’re forced to fill one in. With over 200 intricate questions about your income you’re left confused, and unsure of where to even fill out your name.

Sure it comes with a booklet, but nobody is ever going to read that. Please let’s put the responsibility of these monstrosities on the school’s.

Teach us, teach us how to fill them in.

5. Brief introduction to First Aid and other safety procedures

By brief, we mean brief.

Teaching too much first aid could be counter-effective, in that if something had to happen, 40 self-proclaimed mini doctors all trying to help might make matters worse… but then again, 40 people doing nothing at all could be just as bad.

A simple know-how in case you’re out and things take a turn for the worse can only be helpful. Just the basics really, they should be taught, practised and understood. After all, it can only serve to help in a crisis.

6. Understanding Pay slips

WTF is N.I, and why are they taking my money?

When first receiving a payslip our eyes immediately zoom towards our net pay… or is it gross pay? Wait a minute what’s this N.I deduction!

Understanding your payslip is extremely important. Knowing where your money is going and for what reason is imperative to your mental health.

God knows you’ll need your mental health if you wish to grow old and get cash in on all that national insurance, and pension you’ve been paying.

7. Your online footprint

With the kids these days overtaken by social media, and an overall online presence, it is extremely important that our education catches up, and teaches students about both the dangers, and the wonders social media, and the internet have to offer.

Helping explain to students the importance of having a somewhat clean social presence should be a priority. What we mean is that their email should not be [email protected] and their profile picture should not resemble something out of a badly copied local Playboy magazine.

Be classy, and save it for Snapchat if necesssary