Maltese Real Estate Website Descriptions vs. The Truth

Hawn fejn il-ħanżira ġibtni?!

Screen Shot 2016 12 02 At 17 43 44

Property searching can be fun if you've got the patience of a saint. For the rest of us, it is a long, tedious process of anticlimactic disappointments. The supposedly 'sought-after' area advertised on the real estate website turned out to be a house nested between Carmen il-ġellieda and Nancy in-nittiena. As for the penthouse you really liked...

'X'penthaws? Dak ilna li għamilna il-promise of sale!'

Here are but a few examples of what is listed on Maltese property websites and what they really mean:

1. 'Some Maintenance Needed'

i.e. 'Ħa jaqa' s-saqaf bro'

Dengerrr

2. 'No Detail Was Spared'

i.e. Ħa ssib xeba bolavostri u ljuni

Exciteddd

3. 'With Some Imagination, This Property Could Be Converted Into A Charming Family Home.' 

i.e. Għandek bżonn ponn magic mushrooms.

Exactly how much imagination are we talking about here? Lewis Carroll kind of imagination?

Trippinyo

4. Designer Finish

i.e. Mejda tal-ħgieg, naqra wall art tal-JB u ejja ħa mmorru.

Nerve

5. Some Updates Needed

i.e. Ħa jaqbdek depression papali malli tidħol bro.

Deprexin

6. Distant Sea Views

i.e. Għandek bżonn binoculars.

'Ħa titwerreċ bro'

Cantseeshit

7. Ideal For A Rental Investment 

i.e. Mhux ta quddiem in-nies imma għal dak il- bouncer Bulgariż jgħaddi, ta.

Bigdawg

8. 'Enjoying Fantastic Countryside Views' 

i.e. Hemm il-ħmar ta' Kola eżatt faċċata u ħa tidgħi biex tmur għax-xogħol filgħodu.

Fejgibtni

9. Good-Sized Back Terrace

i.e. Biżżejjed biex tonxor il-lożor u l-panti.

Tangatajger

10. Cosy Property

i.e. M'hemmx fejn tboss.

Xebaspazju

11. Viewings Highly Recommended

i.e. M'hemmx li neħilsu minnu dan il-post!

Amazingnahlef

Bonus: No Price Listed

i.e. Oħlom bro. #insa #Żmienlgħaks

Callme

Ah, the power of words.

Can you think of any other real estate untruths? Comment below!

READ NEXT: Things You Need To Know Before Moving In With Someone Maltese

Written By

Tina Anastasi

I like turtles.

Comments