Remember the days when someone suggesting spending a day at the beach didn’t fill you with intense and palpable dread? Yes, we do too… only vaguely.
Maltese beaches defined all of our childhoods, and many an islander before us. But that doesn’t mean they’ve resisted the indiscriminating effects of time. Here’s a few things we miss about our beach-going ways of yesteryear (even if some of it was unhealthy and irresponsible).
1. The hopeful (if mild) chance you wouldn’t spend most of the day looking for a place to park
OK, this was always the worst thing about going to the beach.
But remember when circling the respective car park only lasted 20 minutes as opposed to two hours? #Bliss
2. Bringing your own deckchairs and umbrellas
Sure, it meant you had to carry a bunch of heavy beach-props across sand as hot as the depths of hell – but you didn’t need to take a loan out to be able to lay back in restful calm for the day.
3. Being able to hear your own thoughts
There was a time when every single beach in Malta didn’t have cheesy summer hits playing at full volume from three separate food shacks. We miss that time.
4. Oh and, fewer food shacks
We’re not too upset about the availability of practically anything you might ever want to eat at all of Malta’s beaches, but we do kind of miss the simple days when Kinnie, ħobż biż-żejt and granita were basically the only things on offer.
5. More men wore speedos
Not much to add here really.
6. No one knew that much about the perils of sunbathing
We’re obvs not promoting a return to the sun-screen-free days of our youth, but we do miss a time where spending more than 30 unprotected seconds in the sun didn’t give us super real melanoma guilt.
7. And everyone made fun of that one t-shirt-wearing kid
Again, this was glee born from ignorance, but how fun was it to point and laugh at the sunblock-pasted kid with a wet white t-shirt clinging to their pre-pubescent puppy fat? Quite fun, we’re ashamed to admit.
8. Everyone shared things
Going to the beach was like an endless taħlita and tupperware party, with a ceaseless supply of watermelon, cheap lilos that weren’t shaped like fruit or mythical creatures, and full-fat soft drinks. So bad, yet so good.
9. No one cared that much about how they looked
And we had the striped / frilly-skirt-mumkini’s to prove it.
BONUS: Driving home was a joy, not a chore
The wind would actually blow through your hair as you whizzed down the Coast Road. Now, the only wind available is the kind being passed as you drive the two hours it takes to get back home in post-beach traffic. #TakeUsBack