It’s inevitable. When the temperatures get too high in Malta and everyone cranks everything up to keep up with it, the islands are bound to be hit by a power cut (or four). When the gentle electrical humming in our houses suddenly dies down, our hearts sink and we are overwhelmed with the feeling of uselessness.
We run to check the salvavita, but unfortunately this time it’s not the seven ACs around the house constantly blasting 16°C. It’s officially out of our hands now.
Screenshot everything that’s coming up next, we’re laying down a survival guide for this exact scenario. And that’s when, not if.
1. Conserve battery life
We’re talking mobile phones, laptops, tablets; anything that can help get you through this.
We know it’s tempting to continue that movie you illegally downloaded, but ask yourself; is it really worth it?
With everyone panicking over the lack of electricity, our favourite neighbourhood mobile internet service providers are licking their lips. WhatsApp group chats, Facebook Messenger threads, and all social media platforms become absolutely lit with everyone complaining. Try not to get sucked into the hype, and text non stop; this might go on for longer than you hope, and you might need that battery after the adrenaline rush of frustration is well over.
2. OK, maybe just one post
If you don’t tell everyone how you’re feeling with a sarcastic comment, how will they know?
Before your brain registers that the lights have in fact gone off, you must reach for your mobile and post about it. Maybe try doing it on RUBS for a larger reaction?
“Not served by Enemalta“.
That’s a classic 500 likes + status right there. Sure you’re in darkness, but the Likes will keep you company, light up your phone, and your smile.
3. Get out the candles
The light will guide you in your hour of need.
Turning your house into a massive fire hazard is all part of the fun. Get out all the candles you can find from all around your house, light ’em up, and strategically place them around the house to maximise light.
Feeling like you’re in a 1600s church may feel weird for a while, but feel free to gather your family around the salvavita and begin singing some classic church songs.
Get ready to clean all that wax the second electricity comes back though.
4. Go outside
Especially if the lights go out during the day.
Just leave your cave; might as well go for a swim or something till the lights come back. It’s too depressing to stay home anyway.
You could also try visit that one friend who has a generator at home to go along with their nuclear bunker, because heaven knows if their AC is not on 24/7 they will literally die.
5. Talk to your family
Go to the dimly-lit living room, try find your sofa, sit on it, and talk with the family. If you scroll harder through Facebook, you’re going to wake up with blisters on your thumb anyway.
At this point, it’s almost imperative that you avoid playing board games at all costs. Having a chat with the fam is fine, but bringing a competitive aspect to an already non electrically tensed situation will bring arguments. And tensed situations and and arguments are only meant to be had over the Sunday lunch table .
Communication is key. You can get through this, but you’ll have to get through this together.
6. Dream of the before-times
Regret every second you took electricity for granted. All the times you smugly put multi-plug in multi-plug, making your home the equivalent of a mini power station.
Alone, in the dark, and in silence, this is how we pay for our hubris.
7. Call Enemalta
‘Issa too much is too much hux!’
Call them and join the queue; maybe by the time it’s your turn, the lights would be back.
We know you’ve got anger inside you, and you’ve got to express yourself. All you want to do is relax and use your technology. Try not to take it out on them too much though; we’re sure they’re doing their best.