Maltese weddings are a huge deal. From choosing which degree of cousin is to be left out to making sure there’s nothing for Nanna to pick on about your dress, things can get tough.
But while we’re happy to be living in a time when men and women have a (semi) equal say in the nuptial planning, what would happen if Maltese men were given total control of their dream day? These are just a few of the highlights we heard.
1. “I would replace all the excessive catering with doner kebabs”
Let’s be honest, everyone would be happier. Messier, sure, but also happier. #KebabJiPlease
2. “I would swap the cake with a tower of chicken nuggets”
Another win-win situation. Saving cash and nuggets.
3. “I would make sure everyone knows they can come in jeans”
And by “they can come” I mean – “please don’t wear suits”.
4. “I wouldn’t pay for a photographer”
Selfies and nicely asking people to take a photo of you will do just fine. If you’re lucky, your hipster friend would bring a DSLR.
5. “I would make it BYOB”
No bar queues, no one throwing up in the flower arrangements, less spent on gifts and generally happier guests. Sounds like a dream wedding.
6. “I would make the whole thing Lord of the Rings themed”
From a full replica of the Green Dragon Inn, to fluffy hobbit feet given out as slippers, the photos would look adorable and I’d finally live my dream of getting married in Middle Earth.
7. “I would ban heels so no one complains about their feet hurting”
Plus, every man below 5 foot 10 would be happy to not be dwarfed by a sea of six-inch tkaken.
8. “I would set up a Playstation stand for those who aren’t really into dancing”
If there are multiple consoles then it’s a social activity and should be an acceptable way for guests to bond.