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‘The Conflict Was Real’: Ex Radio Host Bravely Opens Up About Her Own Experiences With Suicide

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Ex radio host and local celebrity Trudy Kerr bravely opened up about her own personal experiences with suicide in a heartfelt status.

This comes as a response to yesterday’s horrific video, where a man contemplating taking his own life at the Valletta bastions was being urged to take the decision by onlookers.

The incident triggered many people across Malta, especially those who have experienced similar things in their life.

“In 2002 I spent over two hours sitting on a 6th story window sill battling with the voice inside me that was telling me that the only way out was to fall to my death,” she wrote in an emotional Facebook post. 

The marketing strategist recounted the times when she was battling her inner demons, as she stood sitting on the edge of her window sill contemplating life.

“The conflict was real. My life was over and I was completely alone. The voice was telling me that I didn’t deserve anyone to care. The voice was telling me that I was a complete failure,” she wrote. 

She spoke of how difficult the conflict was at that moment, as she battled dark thoughts and an internal voice whispering of disappointment and defeat.

“The voice was telling me that the only option I had was to bring an end to this life that was an embarrassment to everyone who knew me. The conflict was real,” she emphasised.

A sense of appreciation developed within her Facebook post, for not taking that fatal decision back in 2002, as she thanked God and the tiny whisper that prevailed.

“I thank God for the tiny whisper that saved me,” she said. 

Offering support towards others that might be experiencing something similar, she reminded those struggling that they are not alone, and such a position isn’t taken on a whim.

She offered empathy through her words and provided validation for the conflicting situation as it is, honoring the difficulty of such a position.

“None of us are immune, compassion recognizes that anyone of us could find ourselves in such a battle one day. I pray that you don’t,” she continued.

“If you find yourself battling in such a conflict, call 179. Please,” she concluded. 

Kerr finished her status by encouraging individuals that are possibly battling such a conflict to seek help from others, urging them to make use of the 179 helpline.

Many have reacted to her heartfelt post, thanking her for having the courage to speak out about these experiences and acting as a source of inspiration to others who might be struggling. 

If you or someone you know needs to talk to someone about mental health, please call 179. Alternatively, visit www.kellimni.com to get in touch online.

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When Sasha (formerly known as Sasha Tas-Sigar) is not busy writing about environmental injustice, she's probably fighting for women's rights. Follow her at @saaxhaa on Instagram, and send her anything related to the environment, art, and women's rights at [email protected]

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