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Worse Than The Park Hotel? We Took A Look At Some Of Malta’s Worst Hotel Reviews And Here’s What We Found

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The hospitality industry is one of Malta’s main sources of income. Every day of every year, tourists flock to the island for a taste of the sun with the hopes of ending each night on holiday in the comfort of their hotel room. But what happens when you’re not entirely satisfied with the setup of your temporary abode? 

In light of recent events that saw the Park Hotel in Sliema shut down after word broke out of a rat infestation, we thought we’d take a look at what people were saying online about other similarly notorious hotels in Malta.

Hotels can be on the receiving end of a lot of flack, especially during the summer months when tourism is at its peak.

And apart from the actual work they do around the hotel, they also have the online side of hospitality to deal with: reviewing sites like TripAdvisor. 

Reviewers can be brutal in their pieces, and some even hope to gain something out of their complaint. But sometimes, the reviews themselves make no sense. People will wait years to rain shame on a hotel for an issue that only affected them, but their bitterness is something that rubs off on other potential clients that might be interested in staying at a time much brighter than their dark days. 

Ask anyone in the hospitality industry what they think of their online presence.

The big issue with TripAdvisor is that it’s essentially a crowd-sourced forum that can go one of two ways: either the guests have nothing but praise for the establishment (usually because they complained about something before posting online) or they rip the place to shreds with what they think of the place.

Perhaps we ought to be a little more fairer to our comrades working the hotel receptions, on the housekeeping teams, in the underground kitchens slaving away to feed hoards of hungry (sometimes greedy, sometimes lacking in a palette that understands nothing past a plate of oven chips), the poolside staff, security, concierge, you name it. Put simply: we all should just be a little more accommodating of the shit hospitality staff have to put up with.

Here are 14 of the worst hotel reviews we found while trawling Trip Advisor

1. The Well-Seasoned Traveller

Gardenview Holida Complex, Swieqi

This guy has been almost everywhere. Almost. He just must not have been anywhere that has insects, like, you know anywhere.

2. The Businessman

Gardenview Holiday Complex, Swieqi

This guy was on a business trip, presumably paid for by his employer. He’s also staying in Swieqi, very close to the borders of Paceville, so you would want to feel sorry for him. Perhaps he should have been complaining to his employer, instead, though. 

3. When in doubt, blame it on the entire country’s education system

Tudor Hotel, Sliema

Or the elderly lady that lives there.

4. Seventh Time’s Not Exactly The Charm

Howard Johnson Mediterranea, St Paul’s Bay

You’d think that after their seventh trip to Malta, they’d make it official and just move here like the rest of the expats do. Maybe the Maltese hospitality is just a bit too much for them…

5. It’s never too late

Bernard Hotel, St Julian’s

This woman waited a whole seven years before reviewing her stay. Is that fair? No. But it is a level of petty we should all aspire to reach. Passive-aggressiveness is cool now.

6. Sun, Sea and… Construction? 

Bernard Hotel, St Julian’s

Again, this one waited three years before letting the internet know that our national past-time, construction, ruined her stay. So did a greedy manager, but you’ll find those everywhere. She must have been very unset with the whole ordeal. 

7. Only suitable for sleeping

The St. George’s Park Hotel, St Julian’s

To be fair this guy’s got a point – he is staying right in the heart of Paceville. But then again, what else do you expect to do in your hotel room besides sleep? You’ve got an island to explore!

8. Second chances don’t come easy

The St. George’s Park Hotel, St Julian’s

When their friend got locked inside the bathroom of their room, this reviewer decided to not inform management of their issue. Management then responded, apologising on behalf of the guest’s idiocy. 

9. Raise a glass to the bedbugs

Santa Maria Hotel, St Paul’s Bay

This poor holidaymaker arrived to find her room wasn’t exactly vacant. She stowed the uninvited guests away in a glass to show to the hotel manager… who then moved her and her mother across the road. Problem solved? You could, kind of say that. 

10. At least it was clean…

Santa Maria Hotel, St Paul’s Bay

This poor woman had to suffer at the will of hotel staff who weren’t of her expected heritage. The cheek of it – not employing someone from the reviewers homeland. At least the manager fought back at the review and stood up for his staff. We love an empathetic authority!

11. Come through, Tallinja

Sun & Fun Hotel, Paceville

Easy escape route… when the bus turns up, that is. 

12. You couldn’t even sleep during the day…

Sun & Fun Hotel, Paceville

When the sun is up for around 70% of the day, why not spend all day trying to sleep. It can’t be the heat keeping them awake, surely. It must have been our old friend Mr Construction.

13. Staff may contain… comments of a sexual nature?

Hotel Roma, Sliema

If he could kindly make up his mind on what his paranoia actually heard, that’d be grand. I have a judgment to make.

14. I Can’t Believe It’s Not Free Wifi

Hotel Roman, Sliema

While it is currently 2019, 2017 was only two years ago. We’d like to hope this hotel has since improved their internet policies for guests. We’d also like to hope this reviewer actually made it out of the hotel door without tripping over his jaw at the cost of WiFi per day. Fingers crossed he made it across the road to a cafe with free connection.

When things go wrong, we all like to blame the first port of call we can find (usually the poor intern left to cover the early/late shifts at the front desk), but we can never be sure of what is happening behind the scenes. Perhaps the waitress you kiss your teeth at is feeling awfully homesick. Maybe the hotel manager has his hands tied because the powers above just won’t listen to his plea.

Hotels sure do have it hard across the entire island, but how do hotels in Malta fare in the great hospitality war?

Every hotel listed in this article is some of the lowest ranking facility in their respective localities. The Tudor Hotel in Sliema is currently ranked 22nd out of 24 listings and there are no attached photographs of the hotel, neither does Google have it listed on Maps.

All hotels above are rated no higher than 2 stars overall, which is an average score calculated after reviewers have scored the hotel out of 5 on a number of various points.

If only.

Through our research, it seems that most hotels have great points for location but start to dip once we get to cleanliness, service and value.

Not to say that Malta has some of the worst hotels… just that maybe some of them still in operation could learn a thing or two from the recent events at the Park Hotel in Sliema.

But let’s not forget to lead with our heads and not forget that we do still have hearts. It’s hot outside, people can get flustered. Besides, it’s probably hot inside the hotels as well, considering almost every review complains of no air conditioner being available. That, or they just make it very obvious how overtly economical they are – because if you open air traffic to Europe’s cheapest airline you’re obviously going to attract xeba rich kids.

Tag someone who loves leaving online reviews of the places they visit

READ NEXT: Sliema’s Worst-Rated Hotel ‘Categorically’ Denies Rat Infestation After Being Forced To Shut Down

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