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People Are Unearthing A Bunch Of Cursed Maltese Dishes And They’re Giving Everyone Nightmares

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Satanic rituals usually include large stone altars, a ram’s head and maybe a young virgin… but we’re willing to bet you could still go quite far with a couple of these Maltese dishes.

F Living has long served as a purveyor of all things fantastical-but-kinda-freaky in Malta’s broadcasting landscape (maybe that’s what the F actually stood for all along). In the last 24 hours, though, a new ghost of F Living past has resurfaced, and it’s haunting thousands of people.

OK, so first things first: Pastizziposting is back, and there’s already over 10,000 people in the new home for Maltese memes and shitposting.

Last night, as some admins and mods of the group came across a number of dishes with questionable auras posted by F Living over the last half a decade, the cursed cuisine made its way to Pastizziposting.

Within minutes, dozens of the disturbing dishes were posted on the group, triggering a lot of questions, even more memes, and a couple of nightmares too.

So hop on board for the highlights of the  most questionable culinary adventure you’ve ever been on. Good luck.

1. Do you prefer the outside or the inside of this bad boy?

Spoiler Alert: whatever your answer is, it’s wrong.

2. The One With The Demonic Fish Head

I have no words.

Well, I do, but they’re all in Latin and Ancient Sumerian.

3. Hungry yet?

Go on. Eat.

4. A hearty meal for the colder season

This will definitely keep the doctor away. And probably everyone else.

5. Is that… ?

That could be a lot of different toppings, but one specific one cums to mind.

6. Fido was having a bad day…

Feel free to look away from the screen for a couple of minutes if you need a break. I’ll wait.

7. Charcuterie Maltaise

Someone please send this photo to Gordon Ramsay.

8. The Fortress Of Fine Dining, Part 1

At least it’s got the whole “takes a lot of preparation and skill to come up with and arrange” thing going for it…

9. They say the best things come in pairs…

Please tell me I’m not the only one seeing what I’m seeing…

10. The Fortress Of Fine Dining, Part 2: Ravjul Castle

Ten thousand points for creativity.

A whole lot of other points for other categories.

11. That new remake of The Blob is looking great

It came from the deep. And it should probably stay there.

12. The Other One With The Demonic Fish Head

Fuck shit up enough times and you’ve got your hands on a new art form.

This whole meme seems to have started even earlier this year… but it’s in the last 24 hours that shit really hit the fan.

“A bunch of us were staying in an apartment for a weekend over summer and we came across all this F Living content,” one of Pastizziposting’s admins told Lovin Malta. “Some of us spent over 10 hours daily watching their programmes.”

Fast forward to today, and Pastizziposting is chock full of dozens of memes, and they nearly all have to do with specific dishes, the station’s chef… or the inexplicable spike in traffic F Livnig’s Facebook page must’ve registered overnight.

Meme by D. Muscat Caruana

Meme by D. Muscat Caruana

Memes of cursed cuisine and satanic chefs aside, though, you have to hand it to F Living’s cooking team.

They’ve managed to come up with all these insanely intricate – or downright confusing – dishes for so many years and have passionately stuck to it, always seeking to boldly go where no chef has ever dared go.

If insanity really is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results, we have got to be looking at one of Malta’s sanest groups of people ever.

Tag someone who would actually devour most of these dishes

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