Boy, that was quick, huh? The whole world went from slightly tilting its head in amused confusion whenever a group of masked Chinese tourists walk past, to being forbidden from doing anything in public without a face mask. And all it took was a couple of months.
Back in Malta, public transport passengers and shop customers are being heavily encouraged by law to wear face masks, with some people even opting for the slightly more obtrusive (but protective) face shield. Masks, gloves and shields have suddenly become the talk of the town.
We know these are tough and uncertain times for everyone but we hope this list of seven other uses for a face mask will cheer you up a little.
1. Think of your loved ones… and use the mask if you have bad breath.
Some of you are laughing. Others are laughing a bit more nervously.
We all know at least one unfortunate soul with bad breath who we just can’t really stand being overly close to for an extended period of time. And if you can’t think of someone, then I hate to break it to you; it’s probably you. Skużani xbin.
Make the most of the popular surgical masks’ three layers or protection to protect yourself or your loved ones from a serious case of mouth stench. Thank me later.
2. Use the face shield to finally stop those pesky onion-chopping tears.
The world is currently a stressful place with a lot of triggers, and the last thing you want is to end up crying because of some stupid onion.
Sure, you can freeze the onion or run it under water while cutting. You can even chew gum, or cover your knife in lemon juice before chopping the onion. I’m sure there’s some other weird technique your nanna taught you too.
Or, you can keep doing what you’ve been doing for years, and just add a simple face shield. So long tears, not today.
3. Become an instant pro at poker.
They say the eyes are the windows to the soul… but they’ve never seen all the different shapes my mouth makes when I pull out two Aces in a game of poker.
Show your competition less and make sure you win more by adding a face mask to your next family poker game. If you really want to throw them off course, add a face shield to the equation for some added effect. And hey, sit opposite a light source so that you’ll have a constant semi-reflected glare on your side.
4. Congratulations; you’ve finally found a great excuse to not talk during the next Zoom meeting.
“Sorry guys,” you say in a muffled voice as the connection strains to transmit what you’re saying to all the people in the virtual meeting.
Helplessly point at the mask and shrug when they ask for your input, and nod when you agree with something. It’s better than any “Iva ta’, naqbel perfettament” you could ever say.
Kudos; you’ve just won Zoom calls, and all it took was a face mask.
5. Use this as the perfect opportunity to practice smizing.
Ever since supermodel Tyra Banks came up with the (quite frankly genius) idea of just bringing the phrase “smile with your eyes” down to the much simpler “smize”, models, influencers and Instagram afficiniados the world over have been trying for years to master the art of getting a genuine-looking smile in their photographs.
With most of Malta on social media and a whole lot of smiling selfies on beaches expected at any moment, this is the right time to become a cut above the rest.
It’s tough to perfect smizing when your mouth is doing all the work, but what better time is there to finally get good at it than with your mouth covered? No better time, that’s what.
6. Finally play a proper game of Charades where people don’t use their damn mouths.
This one’s a massive pet peeve of mine, but if I’m playing Charades, you’d better not start writing down rough hints or flat out making very weird almost-word noises.
It happens every time, and it feels like we’ve all come to accept a sound or two slipping out in the silent game. And God knows it only gets worse thanks to how uncontrollably loud and emotive we Maltese people are.
But my proposition to you is a very simple one: put on a mask the next time you play a round of Charades with the family, and watch the ante being properly upped for once.
If you’re thinking it’s been a while since you last played Charades, then use this downtime to go back in the game… properly this time.
7. Contain your emotions (and words) when someone grinds your gears.
Ever said (or looked like you were about to say) something you’d regret? Maybe you found yourself saying, “Man, I wish I had a muzzle or something?” Well, welcome to 2020’s muzzle.
Maltese temper isn’t traditionally one of the longest in the world, and with temperatures only getting higher, some heads are about to get as hot as our sandy beaches.
Contain it all inside your little mask of wonders and save yourself the hassle of having to explain why you look like you’re about to tear someone’s face off. The muffled way that last word you just uttered came out also definitely helped.
Of course, we all know why we’d use a face mask in 2020… and if you still need to get your hands on a couple, you need to check out Medik Malta.
Supplying face shields and the all-too-popular surgical masks currently being used by 90% of the world, Medik Malta will satisfy all your protective gear needs.
They’ve already helped arm a great deal of companies, offices, supermarkets and a whole array of other shops with face masks, so you know Medik Malta mean business when they say they want to provide you with the necessary gear in these COVID-19 times.
The surgical face masks are an absolute bestseller, coming in super handy thanks to their three layers of protection and small rigid top part to perfectly fit any face shape.
These ear loop face masks are high quality, disposable models that prevent bacterial contamination. Medik Malta supply a pack of 50 of the masks for €39.98, delivering all around the island within 48 hours to help you stay safe.
They’ve even got disposable vinyl gloves and the higher quality KN95 masks for sale in case you want some more added protection, and it’s all available on their site right here.
But that’s not all. Medik Malta is offering all Lovin Malta readers a 10% discount!
Yep, you read that right.
When making a purchase of at least €20, just enter the discount code LOVIN10 and benefit from 10% off your entire order!
The offer is active for everyone until 23rd May, so get ordering and protecting your household today.
And while we’re at it, we’ve also teamed up for another great offer – we’re giving away a free pack of 50 face masks!
All you have to do to be in with a chance of winning is tag someone in the comments section who you think needs to hear about the good news, and you’re automatically in with a chance. Because yes, just like a silent round of Charades, the best things in life are simple and free.