7 Perfectly Valid Reasons Maltese Couples Break Up

Ready yourself for the village gossip


Maltese people are not lacking in passion. Finding love is at the top of many of our islanders' priority list, and when we do it's even better than the sun shining on you at Riviera on a clear, summer's day. 

But that sunshine sometimes gets just a tad too hot. You feel flustered, restless, uncomfortable. You can't wait to liberate yourself and get right back into the sea again where all the other fishes are waiting for you.

When that happens, here's a few valid reasons you can break ties with your Maltese lover:

1. Their mother is just too overbearing

Look, I'm tired of pretending that Doris' timpana is the best I've ever tasted, and if I have to hear another back-handed compliment that really means "you look fat", I'm going to kill myself.

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2. They live on the other side of the island and it's just too far

I love you, but I can't spend another nanosecond in traffic to get to you.

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3. They have different political views

And my nanna would disown me if she found out I'm dating someone from the other side.

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4. You're still in love with their cousin

I'm not even sure if she's your third cousin, or second cousin once removed – but I when I look at you I literally see her face. 

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5. Your kids would be midgets

Seriously, our combined height is about 4 feet. This has to end. 

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6. They're from the wrong side of the neighbourhood

You're San Bastjan not San Ġorġ? See point number 3.

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8. They would choose Maltese sausage over pinky sausages if they were held at gunpoint

I'm sorry, I just can't get on board with that kind of value system.

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9. They are actually your cousin

We always knew there was that risk...

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Are there any other typical Maltese reasons that merit ending it all? Tell us in the comments section!

READ NEXT: 9 Things Maltese People Do After A Breakup

Written By

Ann Dingli

Ann Dingli writes mostly about art and design. She enjoys friendly debates and has accepted that she's a small person.