Here's What The Soon-To-Be-Launched 'New RUBS' Page Could Look Like

Malta's most active Facebook group is at it again.

New Rubs

There are literally dozens of offshoots from the in/famous Facebook page 'Are You Being Served (Malta)'. But now, revelling in the speculation of her groups' users, Moira Palmier has teased a new group that is soon to open. 

Of course, people took to sister-page 'The Salott' to discuss what it could possibly become - and here's our predictions for what it will turn into shortly after.

1. RUBS Nostalgia

Rubs Nost

Starts out as: A cute collection of memories from across Malta and Gozo.

Turns into: A collection of racist sentiments, nostalgically remembering the time when "Malta was of the Maltese".

2. RUBS Google It

Rubs 1

Starts out as: An explanation page highlighting exactly the sort of things you can save time on asking about by simple hitting up google.

Turns into: "Hey guys, does anyone know where I can find the RUBS post about how to google things?".

3. RUBS Medical

Rubs 1

Starts out as: An interesting page highlighting medical advancements, treatments in Malta and stellar doctors across the island.

Turns into: "Hey guys, which pharmacies are open today" repeatedly posted between ALL CAPS anti-vaccination comments.

4. RUBS Traffic

Rubs 3

Starts out as: A useful guide to areas with high congestion and a place to learn about traffic patterns

Turns into: A competition as to which political party gets the blame for our terrible roads, and a never ending comments war that always start as "dear drivers" or "dear motorcyclists".

5. RUBS Football

Rubs 4

Starts out as: A place where fans can discuss where to watch the games, and newbies can learn a few tidbits to carry on a conversation at work.

Turns into: A wonderful collection of the most colourful words in the Maltese language and a lot of people who've never watched a local game giving their expert feedback.

6. RUBS Weather

Rubs Weather

Starts out as: A way to tell what weather conditions are like, some cool footage of freak storms across the island and maybe some discussions the harmful impacts of climate change over the past few years.

Turns into: An excuse to never look out of the window again, and a lot of angry photos of 'chemtrails'.

7. RUBS Dating

Rubs Dating

Starts out as: Posts with good locations for first dates, dos and don'ts of Maltese dating and maybe a happy-couple story or two.

Turns into: A long list of awkward selfies looking for love, 90% of which are people who were dumb enough to leave their Facebook open around their friends.

8. Belly RUBS

Rubs Last

There's no way this one could go wrong and we want it to be a thing.

What RUBS page do you want to see opening? Tell us in the comments on Facebook - Moira may make your dreams come true!

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Goat Writer

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